It’s been 20 years since I graduated from college. Not sure where the time went. I won’t be going to my reunion, but I’ll be posting a few blogs this month about some of my favorite college memories. Here’s one of those .
College is all about getting an education. But much of my learning wasn’t book learning. Here are 10 of the many things I learned in college:
Watching Jeopardy is not a substitute for studying. Sure, biology (or whatever subject I had an exam in the next day) might be one of the categories on Jeopardy that night. But what are the chances? (Don’t ask me. Math wasn’t on Jeopardy tonight.)
The Civil War ends the same way down South as it does up North. But I sat through a semester of Civil War and Reconstruction just to make sure.
Chicken patties are the best cure for a hangover. Must be served with French fries. If it’s a cordon bleu chicken patty, even better.
Don’t put birthday candles in a pizza. Hot pizza and wax don’t mix. Very melty mess.
Don’t throw keys to your friend across the parking lot. I was neither the thrower nor the throwee. But the keys did end up through the back window of my car.
Ceramics is a class that should be taken pass/fail. Or at least in my case it should have been. I mean, can you really put a grade on art? (Apparently you can.)
A goldfish cannot live in an Absolut bottle. Maybe it was the lack of oxygen. Maybe it was the residual alcohol. Either way, poor Glenn didn’t stand a chance. And none of us could use the toilet we flushed him down the rest of the semester. I mean, it was his grave.
Making a mix tape is an art, not a science. It’s more than just putting songs on a tape. You have to pick just the right songs and put them just in the right order. Only an artist can do that.
DJs play long songs so they can go to the bathroom. I learned this one the hard way during my 7 a.m. shift at the radio station. Good thing the Smashing Pumpkins had some long songs.
Never go to bed early. Even if you friends are nice enough/drunk enough to tape their conversations, they’re still better in person.
And the most important thing I learned while writing this? All those things I swore I’d never forget while I was in college? Yeah, I forgot them.